Pants, trousers, pantaloons

From Plastic Tub

"I never knew a man who could use rough twine for a belt so eloquently."

"Even when running around the convention in '68 nude from the waist down, he managed to impress us all with the quality of his pants."

"My favorite was the kilt he had with two extraneous pantlegs which flopped about as if he were a double amputee. When I asked him, however, to explain, he just punched me in the nose and began to piss on his shoes, whistling Dixie. It was then that I finally understood what he meant when, years before, he'd called me a "delicate spoon."

"And all that time I thought he was a Mexican!"

-- Balthazar Buehb, with Larry King in 1989.


"Whether in shrubbery or piled w/ankles, smart pants can change the world."

-- back of empty bourbon bottle, 1982


"Smart pants technology is going to change everything."

-- Anonymous game developer, 2004 Electronics Expo, Los Angeles


"'Twas as if we were flying by the seat of our pants" Miss Lana Hussy -Nazi Air Command and the Female Bodygaurd-....

-- Dimestore Pulp found in brown bag behind dumpster June 19, 1944


"And they shall be called Pantaloons in the House of thy Lord!"

-- Cleo James Thurstunwell, Corner of 19th and Clairmont c.e.


"Acrid finger-wartful-orifical thrust,soiled pants knot your neck."

-- excerpt from The Dangerous Contest, short poem of sorts from the Associationalist archive.