Stop! You!

From Plastic Tub

A rare phonographic picture-disk published by The League of Gnomes in 1996. Although it bears the Alpha Chimp imprint, this is now recognized to be a fraud, although many conspiracy theorists point to it as evidence of AA/Gnomes collusion.

The disc is notable not only for the power of its propaganda, but for the sound of one hand clapping to be heard on the B-side.

Each copy bears a unique Kirilian portrait of President Bill Clinton. The LP's are rumored to be worth millions on the black market, although aside from their rarity, no one knows exactly why. One theory is that encoded within the text are instructions for accessing several of the Gnomes Swiss bank accounts. If true, it is indeed a valuable item and a ballsy show of nonchalance by the normally reticent Gnomes.

Critical Appraisal

"...[it is] the madness in the shadows of modern life." - Clinton

"It still remains true that I, personally, cannot believe every incident in this ... (the phone in the toilet being the one that immediately springs to mind). But please note that I did not say that the incidents were not true, but merely that I could not believe them." -- Goddwilie, David. Letter to the Editor (Katherine A. Powers) (in response to "Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time."). August 6, 2006.