Transpants

From Plastic Tub

Transpanting is a method of transferring pants from one person to another, across a great physical distance. Early experiments by Addisson and Adid in this area proved unsucessful; many suspect, however, that they had in fact perfected the technology and utilized tales of explosive mishaps, torn ligaments, and embarassing nudity as disinformative cover stories. The German School of Re-Design is also generally assumed to have successfully transpanted several unwitting Costa Rican natives.

Despite the international ban in 1953, numerous glaring examples of the phenomena have been observed. Several unreliable witnesses have testified, for example, that Easton W. Wunderkidd narrowly avoided a drunken raping when his skirt mysteriously transformed into baggy corduroy pants only seconds before consummation (Moscow, 1988).

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