Purvey Dicklock

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-American plumber found dead in his home during the fiery summer of '03. He was found with a note tied around his neck which read: "Beastly demon in charge og a vicious gang, their li^ps around the cock of the most ermous shenanigan. Get it over with, there isa giunshot.oer." In an unusual twist, the note had been the murder weapon, a sort of garrot which had been wound tight with a [[Crossed Spoons Device|wooden spoon]].+[[Category:Personages]]<table width="100%" border="0" align="right" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0">
 + <tr>
 + <td width="*" align="left" valign="top">{{Template:SuspiciousDeaths}}American plumber found dead in his home during the fiery summer of '03. He was found with a note tied around his neck which read: "Beastly demon in charge og a vicious gang, their li^ps around the cock of the most ermous shenanigan. Get it over with, there isa giunshot.oer." In an unusual twist, the note had been the murder weapon, a sort of garrot which had been wound tight with a [[Crossed Spoons Device|wooden spoon]]. Stretching the [[dead man]]'s skin back tightly toward the scalp, "it resulted in a sickly smile that said, in effect, I understand you must paddle me, brother, but not too hard, please". {{an|1}}
-The careful student of the macabre will remember that the same kind of death later befell [[Richard Lancelyn Green]]. Found on his bed almost a year later, Green's death, despite his insistence in months prior that he was being watched by a [[Stanley Adcock|mysterious American]], was ruled a suicide.+[[The CareFull Student|The careful student]] of the macabre will remember that the same kind of death later befell [[Richard Lancelyn Green]]. Found on his bed almost a year later, Green's death, despite his insistence in months prior that he was being watched by a [[Stanley Adcock|mysterious American]], was ruled a suicide.
-In the Docklock case, the police were adamant: this was a murder, a murder, we may add, that remains unsomved to this day.+In the Dicklock case, the police were adamant: this was a murder; a murder, we may add, that remains unsolved to this day.
-Dicklock was a bachelor who made a good living at his chosen posession. A keen fly-fisherman and collector of toy [[bicycle]]s, he was not known to have any enemies. A rather reserved heavyset fellow, his only known social outlet was the rather improbably named Light of Sirius Lodge #27, Freeville, KY, a [[Freemasonic]] body of regular standing.+Dicklock was a bachelor who made a good living at his chosen posession. A keen fly-fisherman and collector of toy [[bicycle]]s, he was not known to have any enemies. A rather reserved, heavyset fellow, his only known social outlet was the rather improbably named Light of Sirius Lodge #27, Freeville, KY, a [[Freemasonic]] body of regular standing.
 +In 2006, Dicklock's family filed suit against the [[Iagoville]] Police Department over leaked photographs showing smiling deputies giving the thumbs-up sign of the deceased man's naked, bloated corpse.
== See Also == == See Also ==
 +
---- ----
*[[BBQ]] *[[BBQ]]
 +
 +== Notes ==
 +
 +----
 +<font style="font-size: 90%">
 +{{anb|1}}Max, D.T. "National Smiles". ''The New York Times''. 11 Dec. 2005.
 +</font>
 +
 +</td>
 + <td width="180px" align="left" valign="top" bgcolor="#E0E0E0" style="margin: 0 0 1em 1em; background: #E0E0E0; border: 1px #aaa solid; border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 100%;">
 +[[Image:Spoon.jpg|thumb|center|The actual spoon used in the Dicklock murder was one of the most common varieties sold on the market.]]
 +== Desiderata ==
 +
 +----
 +<font style="font-size: 90%">
 +''Sherlock Holmes would have been quick to note'' that on Purvey's nightstand stood a warm saucer of gin with a single, floating red pubic hair.
 +
 +</font>
 +</td>
 +</tr>
 +</table>

Current revision

Suspicious Deaths


American plumber found dead in his home during the fiery summer of '03. He was found with a note tied around his neck which read: "Beastly demon in charge og a vicious gang, their li^ps around the cock of the most ermous shenanigan. Get it over with, there isa giunshot.oer." In an unusual twist, the note had been the murder weapon, a sort of garrot which had been wound tight with a wooden spoon. Stretching the dead man's skin back tightly toward the scalp, "it resulted in a sickly smile that said, in effect, I understand you must paddle me, brother, but not too hard, please". 1 

The careful student of the macabre will remember that the same kind of death later befell Richard Lancelyn Green. Found on his bed almost a year later, Green's death, despite his insistence in months prior that he was being watched by a mysterious American, was ruled a suicide.

In the Dicklock case, the police were adamant: this was a murder; a murder, we may add, that remains unsolved to this day.

Dicklock was a bachelor who made a good living at his chosen posession. A keen fly-fisherman and collector of toy bicycles, he was not known to have any enemies. A rather reserved, heavyset fellow, his only known social outlet was the rather improbably named Light of Sirius Lodge #27, Freeville, KY, a Freemasonic body of regular standing.

In 2006, Dicklock's family filed suit against the Iagoville Police Department over leaked photographs showing smiling deputies giving the thumbs-up sign of the deceased man's naked, bloated corpse.

See Also


Notes


Note 1:  Max, D.T. "National Smiles". The New York Times. 11 Dec. 2005.

The actual spoon used in the Dicklock murder was one of the most common varieties sold on the market.
Enlarge
The actual spoon used in the Dicklock murder was one of the most common varieties sold on the market.

Desiderata


Sherlock Holmes would have been quick to note that on Purvey's nightstand stood a warm saucer of gin with a single, floating red pubic hair.