Ryan O'Donnely

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-{{Template:SuspiciousDeaths}}''American. 1935-1986. He wasn't invited -- we probably said the invitation was lost in the mail. He recieves nothing.''+{{Template:SuspiciousDeaths}}''American. 1935-1986. He wasn't invited -- we probably said the invitation was lost in the mail. He receives nothing.''
'''A Curve Ball''' '''A Curve Ball'''
-Notorious racist, ham-fisted amateur pugilist and one-time Major League pitcher, the career of Ryan O'Donnely reads like a dime-store pulp novel. Famous for his [[O'Donnely's Ribhouse and Honkytonk]] restaurant chain which gathered incredible media attention in the mid-fifties both for its ability to draw the ire of civil rights groups and for its unusual architecture, being very clearly in the shape of a man urinating. His death was the subject of intense national curiousity due to the unusual circumstances. +Notorious racist, ham-fisted amateur pugilist and one-time Major League pitcher, the career of Ryan O'Donnely reads like a dime-store pulp novel, which it was, at least when his ghost-written autobiography [[White Ball, Red Meat]] was published in 1967. Famous for his [[O'Donnely's Ribhouse and Honkytonk]] restaurant chain which gathered incredible media attention in the mid-fifties both for its ability to draw the ire of civil rights groups and for its unusual architecture, being very clearly in the shape of a man urinating. His death was the subject of intense national curiosity due to the unusual circumstances.
'''A Gruesome Scene''' '''A Gruesome Scene'''
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-[[How About a Fist to Face? On The Subject of Negro America]], open letter published in the Iagoville Gazette, 1969.+*[[How About a Fist to Face? On The Subject of Negro America]], open letter published in the Iagoville Gazette, 1969.
- +*Numerous [[O'Donnely Brand Paper Place Mats]], featuring puzzles, mazes and [[Mom Jokes|jokes]], for use in his restaurant chain.
-Numerous [[O'Donnely Brand Paper Place Mats]], featuring puzzles, mazes and [[Mom Jokes|jokes]], for use in his restaurant chain.+*[[Hamfists, Sirloin Feet]], a treatise denouncing [[Mazzistow Carrington's]] BBQ methods.
- +*Numerous knuckle marks on endless cheeks.
-[[Hamfists, Sirloin Feet]], a treatise denouncing [[Mazzistow Carrington's]] BBQ methods.+
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-Numerous knuckle marks on endless cheeks.+
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Current revision

Suspicious Deaths


American. 1935-1986. He wasn't invited -- we probably said the invitation was lost in the mail. He receives nothing.

A Curve Ball

Notorious racist, ham-fisted amateur pugilist and one-time Major League pitcher, the career of Ryan O'Donnely reads like a dime-store pulp novel, which it was, at least when his ghost-written autobiography White Ball, Red Meat was published in 1967. Famous for his O'Donnely's Ribhouse and Honkytonk restaurant chain which gathered incredible media attention in the mid-fifties both for its ability to draw the ire of civil rights groups and for its unusual architecture, being very clearly in the shape of a man urinating. His death was the subject of intense national curiosity due to the unusual circumstances.

A Gruesome Scene

His body was found by his sixteen year old son, Patter, completely dismembered, the stumps of which had been sealed in duct tape, tagged with intricate scribblings and placed in a plastic tub. Though this is known to be the method of execution favored by The League of Men with Fancy Gloves no emblematic red glove was found, suggesting a frame-job. A statue of O'Donnely was erected in his birthplace, Iagoville, Tennessee (since changed to Whitmanburg). Suspected to be a Noble in The League of Gnomes.

Known Works


Desiderata


O'Donnely's father whupped him with a favorite belt made of armadillo skin, not cow skin as was later reported.

"Enormous. It fit his face perfectly." -- O'Donnely's sixth wife, describing O'Donnely's mustache